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Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Possible Wednesday Morning Headlines
Posted By Rebecca Walsh on April 21, 2009, 4:48 PM
Tomorrow morning, after the Jazz have lost game 2 of their series with the Lakers, our local “news” papers will have headlines in the sports section about the loss. Now, I could be wrong the Jazz could win, but… I don’t think so.
God forbid that every sports writer moron (SL Trib / DezNews) stopped using “musical” phrases to recap a Jazz game, such as the “Jazz out of tune” crap. Even the almighty ESPN stooped to a Monson-esque low with “Lakers Quiet the Jazz” in game 1. Oooooohhhhh crafty.
Just in case I’m right, and the Jazz lose tonight, here is what I am looking forward to tomorrow morning…
Trib: Jazz hit a sour note in LA.
DezNews: Jazz notes are sour in LA.
Trib: Jazz Play Same Old Record
DezNews: Same Old Record for the Jazz.
Trib: Jazz Lose, AK First Out of Showers
DezNews: AK First Out of Showers, Jazz Still Lose
Trib: Lakers Silence Jazz, Down 0-2.
DezNews: Jazz Silenced by Lakers, Down 0-2.
Trib: Jazz Drop Game 2, AK Loves to Read.
DezNews: AK Loves to Read, Jazz Drop Game 2 Anyway.
I get that the Trib / DezNews can’t get past the name “Jazz” because they listen to Kenny G. Listen to Hank Mobley and shut the hell up already.
What’s worse is these are the same brain trusts that actually ran very similar stories about how Andre Kirilenko likes to shower fast after a game. Really? Do you think I care that Kirilenko showers fast? So much that you BOTH ran the same damn story? Oh that’s right he reads books too! How lazy are you? Is the expose on Deron Williams facial hair coming this Sunday? What about Korver’s socks? Sometimes up, sometimes down! That’s gotta be worth 800 words. Oh oh and how about Boozer’s tattoos? What do they mean??? Pure gold baby…
Oh crap, I am giving them ideas.
Nevermind.
God forbid that every sports writer moron (SL Trib / DezNews) stopped using “musical” phrases to recap a Jazz game, such as the “Jazz out of tune” crap. Even the almighty ESPN stooped to a Monson-esque low with “Lakers Quiet the Jazz” in game 1. Oooooohhhhh crafty.
Just in case I’m right, and the Jazz lose tonight, here is what I am looking forward to tomorrow morning…
Trib: Jazz hit a sour note in LA.
DezNews: Jazz notes are sour in LA.
Trib: Jazz Play Same Old Record
DezNews: Same Old Record for the Jazz.
Trib: Jazz Lose, AK First Out of Showers
DezNews: AK First Out of Showers, Jazz Still Lose
Trib: Lakers Silence Jazz, Down 0-2.
DezNews: Jazz Silenced by Lakers, Down 0-2.
Trib: Jazz Drop Game 2, AK Loves to Read.
DezNews: AK Loves to Read, Jazz Drop Game 2 Anyway.
I get that the Trib / DezNews can’t get past the name “Jazz” because they listen to Kenny G. Listen to Hank Mobley and shut the hell up already.
What’s worse is these are the same brain trusts that actually ran very similar stories about how Andre Kirilenko likes to shower fast after a game. Really? Do you think I care that Kirilenko showers fast? So much that you BOTH ran the same damn story? Oh that’s right he reads books too! How lazy are you? Is the expose on Deron Williams facial hair coming this Sunday? What about Korver’s socks? Sometimes up, sometimes down! That’s gotta be worth 800 words. Oh oh and how about Boozer’s tattoos? What do they mean??? Pure gold baby…
Oh crap, I am giving them ideas.
Nevermind.
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