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Last week, Marissa Powell, aka Miss Utah 2013, got handed a convoluted, humdinger of a question at the Miss USA Beauty pageant. For the unaware, it all went south when Real Housewives of Atlanta and mascara-depository NeNe Leakes asked a three-part head-scratcher and Powell blurted out "Create education better."---
Welcome to The Secret Handshake’s best of SLC’s Craigslist -- a monthly, handpicked selection of Salt Lake City’s finest weirdos and useless hoo-haa.--- For a writer, Craigslist can be a useful place to unearth great story leads, but it comes with a cost.
People like to throw around the phrase “DIY” as if assembling a coffee table from Ikea qualifies you to be the third member of A&E’s Mythbusters. But I think it's safe to say that the phrase “Do it yourself” takes on a bigger meaning if you’re the type of person who spends your weekends terrorizing your neighborhood with a fleet of homemade, hot-rod-inspired go-karts.---
In a classic love story, way better than Twilight, local strip club DJ, Frank Hansen (aka DJ Skanky) fell for a girl -- a beautiful young porn star named Cassidy Lynn. And, like any couple who falls madly in love, the two of them were legally married (by an ex-stripper turned ordained minister) at the location where they first locked eyes, Club Wet.---
Two weeks ago, I had to make a big decision: “Should I or shouldn't I joust radio host Richie T from X96?” On the one hand, I'm not into getting stabbed in the face with a wooden rod. Plus, I've never cared for horses (they have weird-shaped heads and they urinate with an unnatural velocity).---
I've shot quite a few guns in my lifetime, but I've never owned one; I've never felt the need to. If for some reason, a sex-crazed, burglar-terrorist broke into my house, I like to think my dog would bite him in the sack.
I know it may be hard to believe, but not everyone who frequents nerd conventions dresses up in cosplay costumes. That's right, after visiting 2013 SLCNerd Expo at The Complex last Saturday, I was completely blown away when I discovered people in normal clothes, like khakis, cardigans and long-sleeved T-shirts.--- In fact, despite over-hyped, media-driven stereotypes, more than 18 percent of all SLCNerd convention-goers were not wearing a costume (Disclaimer: 62 percent of all percentages are made up)...
As far as I know, there are three, surefire, 100 percent constants in life -- death, taxes, and if you attach the word “Bigfoot” to something ordinary, people will inexplicably love the crap out of it.--- Don’t believe me? Think back to 1993: How jacked were you to try one of these bad boys?: Ironically, experts claim this pizza tasted exactly like a big hairy foot.
![This West Valley Man Is Forming A Go-Kart Posse [Video]](https://media.fdncms-media.com/saltlake/imager/this-west-valley-man-is-forming-a-go-kart/u/review/2302163/blog9556widea.webp)
![Yup, A Strip Club DJ and an Ex-Porn Star Got Married. [Video]](https://media.fdncms-media.com/saltlake/imager/yup-a-strip-club-dj-and-an-ex-porn-star-g/u/review/2301972/blog9502widea.webp)
![A Knight's Fail: The Day I Jousted X96's Richie T [Video]](https://media.fdncms-media.com/saltlake/imager/a-knights-fail-the-day-i-jousted-x96s-r/u/review/2301808/blog9452widea.webp)
