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Eight rejected sign-offs for local TV newsanchors Michelle King (KUTV 2) and Dick Nourse (KSL 5), who retired at the same time Wednesday night:
8. King: “Thanks for watching my final night on the air instead of Count Chocula’s.”
7. Nourse: “You know the best way to get over Dick Nourse? Ointment. Ha!”
6. King: “You think you’re better than me? Bring it, Shauna Lake!”
5. Nourse: “I’m leaving you in the capable hands of new anchor Bryce Lindsay … Brad? Brian? Uh …”
4. King: “It’s been a pleasure working with you, Mark. And I’m keeping the baby.”
3. Nourse: “It’s for the best—I don’t think you could have taken much more of my face in high-def.”
2. King: “Shots for everybody!”
1. Nourse: “Go fuck yourself, Salt Lake City.”
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