What to Expect When You're Expecting a Pandemic
20 symptoms of a well-lived self-quarantine experience.
By Enrique Limón
• Habitual anxiety.
• The urge to eat EVERYTHING.
• Amnesia trying to pinpoint the last time you showered.
• Bedhead Zoom meetings.
• Newfound appreciation for gray sweatpants (preferably ones with some sort of school logo).
• An inexplicable impulse to try bangs.
• You find yet another use for a tortilla.
• Trend alert: hate-liking tweets.
• Highly questionable DM hollers.
• Failed plans to work out; you opt to trim your bangs instead.
• Live Instagram video notification overload.
• Ironing board DJ sets.
• Making a trumpet from a discarded paper towel tube to play "Taps" during your #summerbod's memorial service.
• Eagerness to receive Facebook event invites you'd normally ignore.
• Coming up with creative solutions to hide your new bangs.
• Ennui.
• More day drinking than usual.
• Legitimate concerns over your toilet paper supply.
• Online wig shopping.
• Two words: Animal Crossing.
Editor's note: For breaking COVID-19 news stories and updates, please check out our blog section or follow us on Twitter @CityWeekly.
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- Apr 2, 2020
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- Apr 1, 2020
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Inside Utah's 'Stay Safe, Stay Home' Directive
Gov. Herbert beseeches Utahns to cooperate with the set of rules through mid-April.
- Apr 1, 2020
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